Football Term
Not to Be Confused with
Surface used instead of grass on some football fields.
Toupee that masks a bad or excessive waxing job (popularly known as a “merkin”).
Ball Carrier
The player who has possession of the ball.
Um, have you seen Kellan Lutz’s new Calvin Klein ad?

Blind Side
The side opposite the direction a player is facing.
The movie that Sandra Bullock might win an Oscar for.
When a linebacker or defensive back forgoes his normal tasks in order to pressure the quarterback.
Knocking over the tourists who stand in the way of you and the perfect black size seven at the Louboutin sample sale.
The Vikings quarterback.
When you tell everyone good-bye at a party but then stay for another round, you’ve “pulled a Favre.”
Bump and Run
When a defensive back slows down a receiver getting off the line of scrimmage.
Sneaking out the door before he wakes up.
Coin Toss
A coin flipped by the referee at the start of the game.
Boom Boom Room, two cuties at midnight: the Yalie or the Princetonian?
Indianapolis’s N.F.L. franchise team.
Recent Harvard grads, you cougar.
Controlling the Clock
Keeping possession of the football for long periods of time.
Three drinks and only one hour deep into the date: aware of the possibility of being smashed before 10 p.m., you keep an eye on your watch.

Delay of Game
A penalty called on a team for letting the play clock expire before snapping the ball, having too many players on the field, or calling a timeout after having already used all they were allotted.
When a girl at the bar tries to block your advances toward the boy you’ve got your eye on.
End Zone
A 10-yard section at the end of the playing field.
When the relationship has run its course, but you’re still dining and sleeping together, you’re in the …
Extra Point
After a touchdown, the scoring team is allowed to add another point by kicking the football through the uprights of the goalpost.
Jewish and a doctor!
Face Mask

The bars attached to a football helmet that cover a player’s face.
Exactly what it sounds like, preferably slathered on by Wendy at Spa Chakra on Fifth Avenue.
Faking a Roughing
An illegal act by a quarterback, kicker, or punter in which he fakes being roughed by the opposition in the hopes of drawing a penalty.
Telling your friends the sex was better than it was.
Fantasy League
A group of fantasy-football teams.
Robert Pattinson, George Clooney, Johnny Depp, Tim Riggins …
First and Ten
When a team has a first down with 10 yards to go to get another first down.
Best intersection to rendezvous with your girlfriends before scouring the East Village flea market.
Forward Pass
Throwing the ball so that it ends up farther downfield than it started.
“That dress would look great on the floor next to my bed.”
Free Agent
A player who is not under contract with a football team.
Recently unleashed gentleman with no social allegiances—or sexual off-limits—among his exes’ friends.
When any offensive player loses possession of the football before a play is dead.
When you meet Chace Crawford at a party at the Breslin and you can’t think of anything engaging to say because your brain stops functioning when he looks you in the eyes. (Still kicking ourselves over this one.)
Goal Line
The line on each end of the field that separates the end zone from the rest of the playing field.
Two carats flanked by baguettes, set in platinum.

When the players on the field discuss the upcoming play.
Seasonal word for gossipy wintertime brunch, especially at a prime table at Café Habana.
Illegal Formation
When there are not enough offensive players on the line of scrimmage.
Heidi Montag.
Offensive Holding
When an offensive player keeps a defender from advancing by grasping him with his hands or arms.
4 a.m., 1Oak, the couple in that corner banquette. (Seriously?!)

The Colts quarterback.
The most handsome, successful, or otherwise desirable in a group of siblings.
Reggie Bush
The Saints running back.
Long-distance relationship. “He’s in Brooklyn; I’m in Manhattan. I adore him, but it’s just such a Reggie Bush.”
A two-point score by the defense that occurs when one of its players tackles an opponent in possession of the ball in his own end zone.
Your go-to booty call after several vodka sodas and tequilla shots.
New Orleans’s N.F.L. franchise team.
Slang for wives who stand by adulterous husbands. (See: Elizabeth Edwards.)
Third and Long
When a team has to run a third-down play in which they need to gain considerable yardage to get the first down.
Your chances of hooking up with Neil Patrick Harris. He has a boyfriend.
Two-Minute Warning
An official’s timeout at the end of each half to signal that just two minutes remain.
The D.V.R. alerts that pop up before the start of Gossip Girl and The Bachelor, forcing you to choose between the two.
Who Dat
The name of a chant of support by Saints fans.
Standard fratty U.E.S. host’s greeting at dinner parties.
Xs & Os
Diagrams of plays on paper, chalkboard, or computer.
P.R. girls’ requisite e-mail sign-off. XOXO!